A young lady named Coco Jones sings the national anthem. Triple H welcomes us to a new era. And right off the bat, the women's world title, with a holographic book citing her passage from her best-seller. Lynch looks like part Santa's helper and part dominatrix.
"Honey, I shrunk Marilyn Mason!!" Whoever this live band is singing Ripley to the ring looks weird. And the lead singer's mike keep cutting in and out. Reports are that Ripley has a bad wrist and Lynch has had strep-throat with fevers exceeding 100 degrees. And, as cold as it is, these two didn't get Ember Moon's memo, complaining about the "fishnet booty butt cheek shorts".
Ripley keeps flinging Lynch around the ring, but the Man keep finding counters. A suplex got countered into a small package. Lynch got the armbar, but Ripley hits a power bomb. Lynch won't let go, so power bomb #2. The arm is still locked. So, a third Powerbomb gets a near fall. Now comes some boob chops, and Ripley introduced herself to the post. Lynch goes for a legdrop and hits it but the champion counters into some submission called the "Prism Trap".
Lynch hits a superplex, followed with an armbar. They both flip over the top, only for Lynch to get dropped via Electric chair. This gets followed up by a frog splash.
Lynch rolls Ripley up for a near pin; Ripley kicks out and goes for the Riptide. But, that gets countered into the "Man-Handle Slam". but no three count. A bunch of counters after Lynch tries for an armbar. Ripley hits the Riptide but gets an close two-count, to the champion's shock. Now, comes a super-plex attempt. Lynch went for a super man-handle slam. But, Ripley escapes, hits Lynch with a Riptide with Lynch's head hitting the turnbuckle, followed by a regular Riptide, and the 1-2-3.
Now comes the tag title match. It looks as if my pick may come true, as the blue belts are on one cable and the red ones are on the other. so, it looks as if these titles are being split. Otherwise, they would have had one blue belt and one red belt on the same perch.
What the heck is this weird purple predator mask that Damian Priest is wearing? So, the rules apparently are the match ends with all four belts get taken down. So I guess, once that happens, whoever has the red belts are the RAW tag champions and the possessor of the blue ones are Smackdown tag champs.
Bate has Balor in an airplane spin, while Balor has a ladder in his hand, which just bonked Kingston right in the bean.
New Catch Republic moonsault and land on everyone. They climb the ladders to get the blue belts. Bate jumps off to stop Priest. But, Priest sets him up for the Razor's Edge and throws him into Dunne.
Miz stops Priest who fails at a skull-crushing finale and ultimately gets double-team when Balor returns. Now for comedy relief!! R-Truth hits the apron and grabs the tag rope, reaching for Miz. While the ref keeps telling him he doesn't need to tag into the match, Priest and Balor look utterly befuddled and throw Miz towards a ladder.
But, Miz hops off the ladder, rolls between Judgment day and actually TAGS R-Truth, to a standing ovation. After he hits the splits, causing Priest to hurdle himself over the top rope, Truth's mimicking of John Cena, shoulder blocks and all, on Balor begins. Truth hits an Attitude adjustment on a ladder on Balor; but boy genius actually goes for a pin. While he slaps the mat and the crowd counts, the Miz reminds him there are no pitfalls. So they hit Priest with a double-team skull-crushing finale.
More silliness!! Since R-Truth thinks DIY is DX, he has Gargano hit Priest with "Sweet Chin Music", followed by Ciampa drilling Seņor MITB with a pedigree. Then, Truth cuts a deal. He tells DIY to get the red belts while he and Miz get the blue belts. But Waller and Theory spoil the party.
They grab the blue belts and are announced as the new Smackdown champions.
New Day knock Theory off the ladder, as he went for the Raw belts. Then they double-powerbomb Waller (with blue belt in tow) into a ladder outside the ring. And to the delight of the fans, New Catch Republic set up table. New Day almost wins the Raw titles, until Kingston jumps backward onto the field. Theory stops Woods on the other side. Dunne stops Theory but he gets DDTed into an outside table for his trouble by Gargano. And Champa splatters Bate and himself from the top of the big ladder to the mat. R-Truth is all alone, looking for the gold. But JD Mcdonough stops him and helps Balor. Yet, Kingston arrives with a chair and tenderized Balor's back. New Day then dumps McDonough onto an outside table.
Priest kicks Woods in the face and give Kingston the Razor's Edge onto a chair. Priest goes for the Raw belts (and apparently the lady ref kept swiping his foot to remind him he's not supposed to win). Miz climbs to stop Priest but gets chokeslammed. Priest needs a new ladder as the previous one nearly buckled. R-Truth actually gives him a ladder only to be kicked away for his trouble. Truth has had enough, pushes Priest off the ladder, gives him an AA over the top rope.
Mr. "What's UP!!" then climbs the ladder. Balor and Priest try to stop him. But Miz grabs a leg of each guy. Truth grabs the red belts and Awesome Truth are new Raw tag champions!!! Talk about a Zack Ryder moment circa 2016!!